What you’re told vs. what it really means (The evil sarcastic version)


It doesn’t take long to mix so I’ll chuck it in for free = Mixing takes time so we’ll just do a quick job which isn’t mixing. I’ll say free as people go nuts when they hear the word free and you’ll forget about the rest.

Mixing is free = I won’t do a proper job but I’ll do something. Or you already paid for it, but sounds better this way. But again people go nuts when they hear the word free.

We don’t use metronome as it’s a waste of time = There’s another band coming tomorrow so we need to be quick.

We’re quick so we mix as we go = We use a live mixer, which we set up once at the beginning of the session then just leave everything as it is and record you. This is mixing for live sound and won’t get you an album sound, but musicians usually don’t know the difference. You’ll have your CD at the end of the day and you’ll sound like on a practice. We also need to be quick as there’s another band coming tomorrow.

I can do a quick “in the house mixing or mastering” for cheap money = I’ll just bring the sound levels up with a plugin. I’m using a website with online algorithm based ‘robot mastering’ software which isn’t real mastering, but again musicians don’t know. If it’s louder they’ll think it’s better. These are like the fast food versions in the music industry.

Everything is quick, cheap and easy = Have I already told you there’s another band coming tomorrow so we have to be quick.

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